Susan Marie Molloy

Life in the Oasis


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A Loss, But Yet A Gain

I lost a good friend today.

The end was unhurried and painful, and it was something completely avoidable.

We knew one another since our days working in the Personnel Department, as far back as 1980. We briefly lost touch with one another when I temporarily left my job to return to college, and we struck up again when I returned to work.

We had tons of fun visiting one another on breaks, going out to lunch, and we even took a few business trips to Washington, DC. Then, when the time was right for her, she retired. I stayed on since I had a couple more years to go before I could take my early retirement.

We texted quite a bit, wherein the topics were the news of our lives, trips, recipes, a few jokes, mourning the deaths of colleagues.

Last summer, her texting increased. “Do you like watching the Presidential debates as much as I do?”

“Yes,” I texted back.  It was as innocent as that.

And we would share nothing more than, “I watched last night,” and our opinions on the speakers’ clothing fashion.  It was as innocent as that.

Then the final two candidates were announced, and her texts became even more frequent. They were off the deep end, and going deeper into the abyss.

In a nutshell, my friend began a daily spam-texting spree with obvious misinformation about “the other candidate.” I support free speech and opinions, but passing along unmistakable lies and grotesque spins is not responsible, and therefore, not conducive to intelligent conversation. Anyone who was inclined to fact-check would see it was all twisted and full of lies.

She went into a meltdown, fomenting an unrelenting negative obsession with whom she didn’t like.

Though I asked her repeatedly, nicely, then boldly to please stop sending me such texts, she nevertheless continued.

Today, I removed her number from my cell phone, but not without first to cheer, then mourn, the friendship we once had. She didn’t respect me. (In all of our long friendship, never did I berate who she liked in anything, nor did I ever discuss politics with her, and neither did she until this go ‘round.)

I wish her internal peace and acceptance.

There are reasons for setting boundaries and for etiquette. They are there to govern how we act in consideration of others and to protect what we deem acceptable to ourselves.

No one should be force-fed crap. No one deserves that. No one.

©Susan Marie Molloy, and all works within.

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Time, and What to Do with It

This is a year of change for me. There are so many new, different, and maybe even unknown changes afoot, and combining all that makes for a busy life.

Some of these changes are purposely a part of my own creation. I’ve resolved to read more – a lot more – and my Kindle bookshelf holds nearly 400 books ready for my eager brain. I’m a big proponent of knowledge, no matter the subject. And, naturally, I’ll continue to share my reviews of the most memorable books.

I’ve been honored to read and review others’ books. In fact, I was sought out particularly by Cathy Kennedy to review her “Meeting of the Mustangs,” which you can read my review HERE ON GOODREADS. It’s a sweet young adult novel that I believe many of any age would like.

Currently, I started reading “Grounded” by Kate Forest. Again, she and her publicist contacted me to ask for a Read and Review.  I’m honored, and I anticipate my review will be written and done sometime in the next week.

I’m also looking forward to digging out my dad’s books on World War II. They are so old that they each cost less than a dollar. I found one for fifty cents. Wow.

Recently, we spent time away on vacation, and the change in scenery and weather was fabulous – and much, much needed. The morning sunrises were breathtaking, and once, when I took the dogs out at 4 a.m., the constellations were as clear as anything you could see out in the country without a speck of white light. We really needed that time away.

Part of this change included a very non-traditional Thanksgiving. We roasted a small Butterball turkey breast, steamed some butter beans, whipped up some creamy mashed potatoes, and ended with cherry Jell-O and canned whipped cream. I could have done without the canned whipped cream (bleh!), but I didn’t have the resources to have fresh.

Some of the change are coming out of left field.  I’m vacillating on the status of a friendship of many years.  My friend seems to have taken up with texting me every day, but not with “HI! Here’s what I’ve been up to . . .” but, rather, with multi-paragraph snippets of the “news,” sports scores, and unfunny editorials written in a voice reminiscent of the lame style you would find on a paper placemat at an out-of-the-way diner.  I’ve gently said I can find my own news topics, please get over your candidate not winning, and how are you doing?  Nope, they still come with a “Ting! Ting!” text alert.  Ugh.  I need to find the “unsubscribe” button on those texts.  I want to remain friends, but holy moly!

And here we are – the last day of November. It seems that summer was just here, and now the Holidays are inching forward. And before you know it, it will be 2017.

As fast as time is racing, I’m resolved to live in the day and savor each hour as best as I can.

©Susan Marie Molloy and all works within.